Goblin Tales For Adults – A close encounter of the feathered kind

This morning (2.30am) when Glob returned to dictate the next part of his latest story, he was not alone. The following is an interview I conducted with Bejuss the one eyed lisping raven with the twisted beak.
Jack.      Good morning sir.
Bejuss.   Rarrk – juth call me Bejuthth, everyone elthe doeth.
J.            I beg your pardon. I was wondering if I might ask you a few questions.
B.           Go ahead.
J.            How is it you are still alive Bejuss? By my reckoning you must be the oldest raven in 
               existence; at least twelve thousand years old.
B.           Rarrk – that’th eathy. If yer ith hatched in Goblindom likes me n Glob yer live forever.
J.            If you don’t mind my asking, how did you get your twisted beak?
B.           Rarrk – me mum trod on me when me wath breakin free from me egg. 
              One time thhe puthed me brother’th egg out of the netht by mithtake. 
              He never wath the thame after that. He flew upthide down from then on. 
              Probably thtill doeth.
J.            So is that why you have your vocal impediment?
B.           Pardon?
J.            Is that why you lisp, because of your mother treading on you while you were pecking
              your way out of your egg.
B.           No. That happened when me lotht me eye. 
              Me wath buthy huntin beeth ter eat when one on them thtung me tongue. 
              It hurt tho much that me poked me eye out on a twig when me wath tryin ter get away.
J.           Well thank you for answering my questions Bejuss. I see Glob wants to
              return to the woods. I hope we will meet again soon – goodbye.
B.           Rarrk – nice ter have met yer.
At that point the two departed into the night, heading back to the woods and I returned to bed.

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