Catch Twenty-Two

Catch Twenty-two or De Ja Vu?

Have We Had Help?

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Thanks to selfish individuals and incompetant management in the supermarkets, while I can still order my weekly food requirements online from the Tesco (Walmart) supermarket I do business with, when it comes to selecting a one hour home delivery slot of my choosing, there are none to be had for the next three weeks!

Plus, when I create my weekly order, because Tesco’s staff fail to restock the empty shelves, there is no guarantee that even if by some miracle I managed to get the delivery slot I asked for, most of what I ordered would not arrive, simply because the pickers are too lazy to go and get the products concerned from the supermarket’s stockroom.

Our government insisted that the at risk groups be considered priority customers (in my case, the over seventies). To that end all of the supermarkets are to serve us first! Sounds good in theory…

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Huxley’s or Orwell’s, The Main Concept Comes to The Same End! (P. 3)

Read and inwardly digest!!!

lampmagician

The Nexus: (Is it Really True, or Truly Real?!)

It is never wrong if we become sceptical repeatedly, and instead of simply believing everything, think a little and do some research. The famous Russian prob gives good advice; Trust is good, Control is better! Of course, I don’t mean everything is a lie, but everything is not true, indeed! Now continuing on my topic (after parts one & two), I dare to confuse the everyday all-day life of some of us and may naughtily stir up some teasing. It will never be boring, I promise!

The world of Nexus! (an extra-dimensional realm of wish fulfilment that exists outside of normal space-time). An imaginary world that can be desirable for everyone. I got to know this world in one of the Star Trek movies: Star Trek; Beyond The Nexus. As you might have seen in this movie, there is…

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Before Television

Welcome to my world…

Have We Had Help?

What did you do before television dad? How many of you have been asked this question by the younger generations? Here’s what I’ve done all my life, and still do. I listen to the world via short wave radio.

I started when I was a highly inquisitive seven year old using the family radio.The tuning was so hit and miss on these old sets that if you sneezed or coughed while you were carefully moving the tuning knob a millimetre at a time while daring not to breath, you could lose the station you had been trying to tune in altogether.

If your father loved short wave like you, and was any good with his hands, he would have made a long wire aerialout of bare copper wire and a couple of insulators, the longer, the better, and suspended it between the house and a tree in your…

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A Review of The Innkeeper on the Edge of Paris by Susan Weintrob

Another review…

J. Schlenker

Foodie Lit
J. Schlenker: The Innkeeper on the Edge of Paris

https://www.amazon.com/Innkeeper-Edge-Paris-J-Schlenker-ebook/dp/B07YX7VN55/

Jerri Schlenker.jpeg
Photo of me on Castle Hill at Nice, France

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Leaving her husband and dysfunctional marriage, Isa packs suitcases with her belongings and heads for France, her grandmother’s birthplace. “In a separate bag, she carried her laptop, electronic reader and two of her most cherished books, Pride and Prejudice and Somewhere in Time.” Isa hopes for true romance and magical across time relationships. And she is not disappointed….She would fix her broken life.”

Isa is on a spiritual journey. Author Jerri (pronounced Jera) told me that her writing is as well. , “I write a lot of my experiences into my characters. I don’t think I’ve ever written a book that doesn’t have a spiritual component. Writing is a part of my spiritual journey

​Once Isa arrives at the inn she chose outside of Paris, she feels strangely…

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Life

Never get too comfortable…

Have We Had Help?

What is life? What’s it all about? We are conceived, then nine months later we’re born. If all goes well we live for seventy plus years then we die. Life places all kinds of obstacles in our way, or should that read fate, or maybe chance, I don’t know for sure. The one thing I know for certain is that life is a gamble at best.
I remember vividly to this day when I was four, sixty years ago now, standing up in front of a chair leaning on its seat, reading out loud to my parents from an illustrated book of bible stories. With the billions of thoughts and everyday experiences I’ve had since then, I wonder why I still retain that particular memory. Thinking about it, it is my earliest.
When I went to school, the one thing I loved more than anything was the written word. Practically…

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Waterloo Teeth

Teeth. Not much to show for a life…

Letters from Athens

Going to the dentist is not my favourite outing, as one can imagine. Coming out of this morning’s visit, my mouth numb on one side, I nevertheless felt grateful to have been born in the twentieth century—in ealier ages, surely by now I would have had but a few teeth left, if any at all. The torture of toothaches and dentures must have been unbearable in those days.

In old portraits, people almost never smile. Smiling might have been considered uncouth and awkward, a serious face more dignified and also easier to get a likeness from, but another reason was that many people had bad or even missing teeth. Not very flattering, even if the subject was clad in velvet and lace.

However, vanity (and practicality) made people look for solutions, starting in ancient times. The earliest known dentures—made by the Etruscans circa 700 BC, also found in Egypt and…

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Nature versus Sheer Stupidity?

Want to cut down plastic polluting our oceans and waterways?

Have We Had Help?

Nature's Packaging – Wood Is Good

Why in this day and age of ‘saving the planet’ do supermarket chains insist on adding their own totally unnecessary non-biodegradable plastic packaging to their food products? Take for example the humble banana. Nature has provided this delicious food with its own sturdy thoroughly biodegradable packaging and yet when you by a bunch of them from your local supermarket, some spotty-faced junior managerial individual on the lower rungs of the promotion ladder decided in their infinite stupidity that it had to be repackaged to preserve its freshness.

First of all when it arrived in the supermarket it wasn’t fresh. It was shipped in a green unripe state across the world to the distribution point where it was artificially ripened before being sent to your store – apples, oranges et al are also treated in the same way.

Secondly, because of your stupid interference you dimwits, all you have succeeded in…

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A Festival of Pettifoggery.

Much about nowt, or, the adventures of Tallis…

Tallis Steelyard

As far as I know, Port Naain doesn’t currently have a shrine to Aea in Her Aspect as the Personification of Pettifoggery. Perhaps there is one planned, but a generation has passed as people quibble about details. Should the Portico have three columns? Four, or even five? Should the architraves be plain, or should they have friezes of dancing figures, and if figures are decided upon how decorously should they be dressed, and is there any room for wantonness?
And then there is the nature of those who will serve at the shrine. Shall there be sub-hierodeacons? And will a sub-hierodeacon have authority over temple wardens, or will that take a full hierodeacon? Or will they accept the reality of the situation and decree that only a Patriarch can discuss policy with a temple warden? And then there are the dancers? Will there be thuribles and will they be swung…

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Dhoby VC

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So many returned service men and women suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder, often unable to cope with society because of it. This short story is not only a tribute to every Victoria Cross winner, but to all returned service men and women. In particular my fellow PTSD sufferers…

~~~

I walked into the autopsy room at the beginning of the day to find a body awaiting my undivided attention which had been found in the woods on the hill beyond the village where I grew up. I was equally shocked and saddened to discover that the corpse on the slab was my childhood friend Dhobi.

Back then most of the kids in our village were merciless towards him, throwing stones and shouting obscenities. None of them knew the simple gentle man hidden beneath the grime the way I did. I was the only kid who didn’t pick on him. To me there was something very special about this loner who had shunned society for the woods. Never once did I wonder why he lived the way he did, nor did he ever offer an explanation. Dhobi was a man of few words.

He taught me how to live off the land, showing me how to make snares, what plants and fungi were edible and those that were not, and what were best for simple medicinal uses. The extent of his knowledge was endless.

Nicknamed Dhobi (a British military slang term for clothes washing borrowed from the Hindi language) for as long as he could remember for the simple reason he hated to wash; to keep out the ravages of the seasons, he wore all the clothes he possessed beneath his tattered ex army greatcoat.

No one knew where he came from. Or cared much come to that. I often asked him, but he merely ignored me. Most adults in our village wanted him arrested; irrationally assuming the worst about him. Fearing that he was some kind of perverted weirdo. If only they had got to know him as well as I had back then…

If my parents had ever found out about my friendship with this solitary man they would have been completely horrified! I used to walk up the hill to the woods from my home every couple of days with my pockets and school satchel stuffed with food stolen from my mother’s larder for him.

Dhobi’s natural gentleness was apparent to anyone if only they would have spent time in his wonderful company. Mice lived in his pockets. Hedgehogs curled up in the folds of his old army greatcoat around his legs as the sun disappeared beneath the western horizon until it was time for them to emerge to hunt for food.

He never ever trapped an animal to eat from his own patch, just in case he may eat a friend of his by mistake. Each spring a Cock Robin appeared in Dhobi’s camp and spent its time in the evenings on his shoulder meticulously pecking mites from his hair and beard. Obviously the respect this gentle man had for all wildlife was passed down through each generation of all the woodland creatures. On one occasion I watched totally spellbound as a Sparrow Hawk brought him a gift of wildfowl.

Dhobi’s greatest friend in his woodland world was a battle scarred one eyed fox that lived with him, keeping him company and sharing the warmth of his constant campfire. At night the old fox slept at Dhobi’s feet beneath the rough lean-to that was his bedroom, lounge and kitchen. Sparrows nested in the bracken that covered it, knowing their young were completely safe under Dhobi’s gentle care.

As I began carefully removing his clothing I found among the few personal possessions he had about him, a faded newspaper cutting from the nineteen fifties showing a photograph of him in uniform with a few lines beneath it explaining the photo and giving his real name. In particular, my eye was drawn to his row of medals.

The first in the line was the Victoria Cross, according to the newspaper cutting, won for an act of total selflessness in the heat of battle when he rescued his comrades one by one while under constant machinegun fire on a now long forgotten hill in the Korean peninsula.

Whatever happened to him to make him retreat from the world of humanity to the natural world? Thinking about it, PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) was more than likely was the cause. Maybe Dhobi and his mates fought for a hill too far. No human would ever know nor care except me.

After conducting a thorough autopsy, determining that he had simply expired due to natural circumstances brought on by his lifestyle, I had him cremated then took his ashes back to his campsite in the woods, where I silently scattered them witnessed by the many creatures he loved.

Rest in peace Corporal Phillip “Dhobi” Anderson VC, friend to all who lived alongside him in the woods.

“The Prophet”, A Poem by Alexander Pushkin

lampmagician

In that challenging year, just before the tsar summoned him, Pushkin wrote the poem “The Prophet”, in which he expands the romantic concept of the prophet to the literal, giving the poet the psyche and role of the Old Testament prophet as described by Isaiah:

The Prophet

Longing for spiritual springs,
I dragged myself through desert sands …
An angel with three pairs of wings
Arrived to me at the cross of lands;

With fingers so light and slim
He touched my eyes as in a dream:
And opened my prophetic eyes
Like the eyes of the eagle in surprise.

He touched my ears in movement, single,
And they were filled with noise and jingle:
I heard a shuddering of the heavens,
And angels’ flight on Azure heights
And creatures crawl in long sea nights,
And the rustle of vines in distant valleys.

And he bent down to my chin,

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